what do I want?

How many of us are really living life with our eyes wide open? How many are really finding that which brings us the greatest joy and pursuing it with heart filled abandon?

Could it be that God is that good and wants us only to have our dreams met fully?

What do you really want to be doing? New career, new relationship? Vacation?

I suggest that what we really want for our selves is also what God wants for us.

problem solving

Can you "fix" a problem from within the problem?

Sometimes when life has shown us challenges the solutions are resting outside of thought.

Resting in a deeper place where a calmness can prevail showing us the way to move.

The mind demands our attention to solve problems...but is the mind the solution or the problem?

Can you rise above thought ignoring fear and find solutions from your bigger self?

So There

There are so many spiritual concepts that we can think about. While we are thinking we cannot simultaneously be our true selves since this is an experience beyond thought.

Maybe as our true selves we would realize our perfection in just who we are and who we naturally aspire to be. Maybe that's a musician, or a great mom, it does not matter what it is.

I aspire to be less what I think would please God and more who God made me to be.

Once stored now released

Its amazing how our bodies store trauma. Sometimes it can feel like the closer we get to joy the worse our bodies feel. I have witnessed fear turning me back from joy as the bodies does its best to catch up.

As more joy comes in the old patterns of fear are released and the bodies heals it self. So it can seem like joy causes the body to hurt or be sick but it is really that joy is detoxifying the body.

What can we do?

Really when it comes down to it how much control do we really have?

We can do our part. Plant the seed, water it, if we have water, protect it from the sun, if we can.

In the end all the forces required to succeed are out of our control.

There is place of helplessness not easily experienced when we realize we are at finally at the mercy of a force beyond our control.

So...so ALL you can to point your self in the right direction and then cry like a baby.

eternally safe

We can't really know all is transpiring in the universe since our minds are so small.

Maybe, just maybe, there is a benevolent involvement and we are all eternally safe, if we chose to be so.

Why I write this blog

I write this blog because I am a living example of alchemy.

Any being can crawl out of suicidal depression and live an empowered and joyful life, because I have.

I write this blog to assure this pathway stays lit.

We all deserve to live a full and joyful life.

Why worry

Breathe in...

Breathe out...all the way out.

and again.

Now is that better?

What were you worrying about anyway?

Where did we pick up the belief that worrying helps anything at all?

Where did we imagine that life need our help in constant worrying?

If life can keep all the planets in line...

I would guess that if we just et out of the way...

our bills we be taken care of as well.

What do you want to teach me?

There are just simply times when growth is pushing in.

Expansion is calling and our resistance to it...hurts.

It is so easy to assume that pain and challenge are a result of life not supporting us.

I contend that suffering is a result of resistance.

Can we embrace pressure pain and struggle and ask what do you want to teach me?

Sooo enlightened!

Its great to think that the more enlightened we become, the more together we become.

If you look at nature you see an acceptance of life rather than a movement toward any sort of perfection.

Maybe feeling angry right now is the highest expression of God.

Can we live not trying to change what is, but rather in acceptance of it?

I am not suggestion to be at the whims of anything. I am suggesting watching all with out judgment realizing life is wiser than you.

Forgetting to worry

Have you ever forgotten to worry for some inexplicable period of time?

How easy life is that moment. Moving from one moment to the next.

It can feel like a tight rope walk at times, but really, it must be better than worrying.

They say it's the grace of God the first time we are touched and reminded who we are. The rest is up to us to "do the work" and meet and be met fully by divinity.

We can no longer control life on this plane after we die. Surrendering to God is inevitable anyway.

Here is to forgetting to worry.

Choice

When I feel DENSE do I have the choice to accept it and be engaged one moment to the next?

There are moments when thought, emotions and sensations are having a very loud party and I want to react, I want to get mad, I want to call the police.

Can I just shrug my shoulders and say "Ahh, Oh well" and just be engaged one moment to the next?

Yes, Yes, Yes.

what if

What if even though your mind was going wild, and you felt angry and afraid, and you body was aching...you were able to observe it all and remain a witness to the experience?

Your mind would slow, you body would settle and the idea you need to solve your problem would come to you from the intelligence of presence.

Try it some time.

Is it me or God in the center? For Winn

As I allow my mind to release and my attention to expand, if I am blessed, I will begin to merge into the present moment.

What is the present moment?

Look for your self.

Is God not every molecule in creation?

Is God's blood not the rivers and the oceans?

Is His body not all wood, metal and flesh?

Is His energy not even the subtlest of thought?

I give everything to God.

Even the separation between me and Him. It's not mine to keep.

It's all His.

The Watcher

If you are not experiencing joy right now, you are suffering.

Its a great place to start. Realize that we exist constantly in states ranging from panic to a mild every day anxiety.

Of course folks will add another experience called denial, but this does not change the fact that if you are not experiencing joy, you are suffering.

Here is whats great. If you are suffering, its your doing. Yes there may very well may be extenuating circumstances, but at some point, at some level, you are translating your experience through your mind and that is where suffering takes place.

Watch your mind, see its judgments and narrative of your circumstances. See the effect they have on your emotions and body. Watch it all until you realize you are the watcher. The watcher is joyful.

Release

Ouch.

When old patterns are leaving your cells and new patterns are emerging it can cause sensation in your body.

When certain beliefs which we no longer need, such as "I am not safe" are released the emotional body relaxes and thus the physical body as well.

All the tension and the disease these thoughts have been causing then begin to release out of the body.

This can manifest in aches and pains in the body

Ouch. Its worth it.

Desire, the dance with God

Where do our desires come from?

Are they separate from us?

Are they separate from God?

Are there heart based desires and mind based desires?

Questioning one's desires can be fruitful.

Choose a desire. How does it make you feel.?

How would the fulfillment of it make you feel?

Does it feel like it comes from you heart of hearts?

Does it feel like it comes from a need to fill a hole of loneliness?

I have found the desires that come as a result of a natural order of serving and love and sharing are wholesome desires that are God given and do not need to be at odds with life.

I have found the mind based desires to be generally fronts for deeper desires that are serving as well.

The desires are in us, how did they get there?

Are they separate from God?

I am safe

Primary. I am safe to breath into this body and enjoy this moment.

Any secondaries? List them with out judgment and offer them to love to be dissolved.

Then repeat primary and feel it sink into your cells.

Repeat again and again.

Affirmations

Affirmations can help one experience presence.

A conscious affirmation can be called a "primary" and might look like..."I am safe and confident in this body".

Any resistance that comes up to the affirmation can be called a "secondary."

Un-checked secondaries will manifest unconsciously.

Say your primary and make note of secondaries.

Offer the secondaries to the heart of Love to be healed.

Keep doing it until you can feel your primary soak deep into your cells.

oh how i do love

I am not my thoughts.

I am not my emotions.

I am not my body.

I am not lost in nothingness.

I am present in my heart of expanding love.

I am present in the power in my belly.

When I see life through presence, oh how I do love.

Tough days

There might be days when you just cannot seem to release your identification with the mind and its its effect on the emotions and body.

These are challenging days.

Just remaining in awareness that you are identified with the mind is a great start.

If you can hold that awareness it will help.

The alternative is to be lost completely in illusion.

Any thoughts we have are illusion. They are not grounded in the now, in life. They are based on past and future.

Wonder what you are indentified with?

Do you sense right now the ultimate majesty of creation? The blissful awareness of the vastness of creation?

Some people live their whole lives identified with their thoughts, emotions and physical body.

Some people live a whole life never once touching the soft face of God.

The face that exists out side of worldly identification.

A love affair happening right now.

You and God and all that is, right now.

Witness the thoughts, let them be.

Witness the emotions, let them be.

Witness the body and let it be.

Then open your heart to dance with life itself right now.

Hear the sounds you were missing, smell the smells.

Remember the simpleness of being.

...Or maybe you will get another chance to come back and be present?

If you don't know how to do this, email me and I will walk you through it. Everyone deserves to dance.

Getting Back to Love

Right now can you breathe three times.

Can you watch for just a moment, the thoughts of your mind?

Can you watch them with no judgment as you might watch a cloud?

Can you watch the emotions generated by these thoughts?

Can watch the somatic responses of your body in relation to these emotions?

Can you sit with this for a moment until....

You may ask...

Who am I?

Death as proof

What happens when someone we love dies?

What exactly is that deep painful feeling we feel in our chest?

We love so deeply, can that feeling in our hearts be proof of our interconnectedness?

Follow that ache to its source and you will see love is rewarded with the knowing that we are eternal and one in spirit.

It is risky to love here on he earth with the potential loss of the body, and it is safe with the realization of our interconnectedness.

Am I leaving room for recieve answes to my prayers?

When I am wanting something so badly, all my energy is going out in prayer.

This outward motion can can block the inward flow, which are our prayers being answered.

When do we trust our prayers have been heard, and sit back some to allow the response?

Maybe what comes is not exactly what I wanted and yet due to an design greater than myself, it is exactly what I needed.

Maybe i just keep praying so I'll never find out.

What is suffering?

When I am lost in the thoughts of my mind. That is suffering.

When I am lost in the waves of my emotions. That is suffering.

When I am lost in the ways of my flesh. That is suffering.

These things are inherently good, lovingly created, and yet needing balance.

I ask simply what am I then if I am not my mind, my emotions and my body?

This is the step into eternity.